Funny Chat And More Runbad

Playing a fish reg on two tables. He's berating me on my terrible play after I smack him in the face set over set.

Dealer: HERO has 15 seconds left to act
Dealer: HERO shows King Queen high
Dealer: urendanger shows a pair of Kings
Dealer: urendanger wins the pot ($81.50) with a pair of Kings
Dealer: Hand #10720675935
Dealer: urendanger has 5 seconds left to act
urendanger: and you play like a complete maniac
HERO: why are you quitting me
urendanger: wonder why you don't when
urendanger: cause you are too good
urendanger: or its 3am
HERO: but you laugh at me
urendanger: not sure
HERO: prob cause i'm good :D
urendanger: without hitting an over set you donk off 500 in 10 min
urendanger: honestly
HERO: :(
HERO: can you coach me
urendanger: 100/hr
HERO: remind me the hands i lost money in
HERO: cause i forget
Dealer: HERO shows a straight, Ace high
Dealer: HERO wins the pot ($71.50) with a straight, Ace high
Dealer: Hand #10720702684
HERO: good call there imo
urendanger: you really are that bad
urendanger: you really are
urendanger: that bad
HERO: i know
urendanger: do you not learn
HERO: i try
HERO: but poker's hard
urendanger: do you not stop and think
urendanger: i play like a complete donk <-- sick typo
HERO: i just press the buttons
urendanger: run well and make a few bucks
urendanger: then run bad and lose 2k?
HERO: ya basically
HERO: it's fun
urendanger: 100%
HERO: :)
HERO: why you so serious, it's just a game
Dealer: urendanger shows two pair, Queens and Twos
Dealer: urendanger wins the pot ($85.50) with two pair, Queens and Twos <-- 3b pot, i had TT he had QQ, he checks low flop which sets off alarm bells and then manages only one street of value
HERO: lol
urendanger: good strategy
urendanger: must work wonders
HERO: thanks
urendanger: and you check with 10s?
HERO: checking QQ in 3b pot is probably good too
urendanger: and you check with 10s?
urendanger: lol
urendanger: good point
urendanger: i see
HERO: hey maybe i can coach you
urendanger: i actually made a great play
urendanger: and you are that bad
HERO: oh :(
urendanger: yes you are
HERO: thought i played that hand pretty good for a se
HERO: c
HERO: ur probably right tho
urendanger: you checked down over pair with 10s
HERO: but you had QQ
urendanger: and i acted first
urendanger: make sense?
HERO: no
HERO: i don't understand
urendanger: iknow
HERO: =(
HERO: what
HERO: i get sad when you limp
HERO: =(
HERO: why did you quit me on other table <-- owning him and he quit cause we got deep
urendanger: do you just make money on rake?
urendanger: rakeback
HERO: no i don't beat the rake
HERO: i make money off the points
HERO: got 3 hats and a jacket
urendanger: you were down 2k after 90k hands
HERO: ya but i had a hat and jacket
HERO: so w/e
urendanger: at .5/1 and 1/2
urendanger: and you want to play me
urendanger: on two tables
HERO: are you good
HERO: how do you know all these numbers
urendanger: wow
HERO: what

Fyi, I don't actually own any full tilt merchandise. Still running like shit tho:

Full Tilt No-Limit Hold'em, $2.00 BB (2 handed) - Full-Tilt Converter Tool from FlopTurnRiver.com

SB ($515.75)
Hero (Button) ($200)

Preflop: Hero is Button with 10, K

Hero raises to $6, SB raises to $21, Hero calls $15

Guy has been 3betting literally every other hand. Easy defend.

Flop: ($42) J, 5, 10 (2 players)

SB bets $28, Hero calls $28

Way ahead of his ass-wide 3betting range.

Turn: ($98) 4 (2 players)

SB bets $466.75 (All-In), Hero calls $151 (All-In)

Snapcall the tardshove.

River: ($400) 9 (2 players, 2 all-in)

Obvious river.

Total pot: $400 | Rake: $0.50

Results:

Hero had 10, K (one pair, tens).
SB had Q, 4 (flush, Queen high).

Outcome: SB won $399.50


Cool.


Full Tilt No-Limit Hold'em, $2.00 BB (2 handed) - Full-Tilt Converter Tool from FlopTurnRiver.com

SB ($525)
Hero (Button) ($245.50)

Preflop: Hero is Button with Q, J

Hero raises to $6, SB raises to $25, Hero calls $19

Same guy as previous hand. Easy defend again.

Flop: ($50) 8, Q, 5 (2 players)

SB bets $35, Hero raises to $104, SB raises to $500 (All-In), Hero calls $116.50 (All-In)

Wait till you see his hand.

Turn: ($491) 4 (2 players, 2 all-in)

River: ($491) 7 (2 players, 2 all-in)

Total pot: $491 | Rake: $0.50

Results:

Hero had Q, J (one pair, Queens).
SB had Q, 7 (two pair, Queens and sevens).

Outcome: SB won $490.50

Np. Identical hand happened earlier in the night too.

Still managed 4 buy-ins tonight. God help me when I see my EV graph.